Happy Monday evening to you! OK, I feel like I have earned the right to do this because afterall I started my “Oscar marathon” at 4pm yesterday on the red carpet with the” E channel gang” and didn’t move a muscle (except to eat my popcorn) until just before midnight, yep…even made it to some of the “after show” parties! Imagine all this, from the comfort of my own home and I can assure you I was by far the most comfy of all the guests:) Take that, all you spanx and Loubutin wearing starlets though truth is if I had been invited, I would have been on the next flight out of here! So……here is my recap on all the glamour, fun, highs and lows hits and misses, the whole enchilada. Please allow me to preface this by first saying this is totally subjective, not in any way meant to offend anyone, that its all relative…….its Hollywood for goodness sake! This is all in the name of fun and entertainment. Part of what makes the recapping so much fun is how we all see things differently……. Cheers to that! This is just my honest take on the show. I actually loved the show overall and felt it was one of the best in years……but we all know there are hits and misses! The hits that speak for themselves….. I felt a definite touch of old Hollywood glamour on Hollywood’s biggest night and I loved and lapped up every minute. From the opening dance of Charlize and Channing….my what a dashing pair to all the nods to “old Hollywood” dressing, the men in their crisps tuxedos, the women glittering like Oscars themselves in their beaded fitted flowy and colorful gowns. All of it for the most part so incredibly glamorous (there were exceptions and we will get to that later) So here is who I think embodied the “Hollywood actress that knows how to rock the red carpet” vibe….. Jessica….so elegant and graceful Naomi looking better than ever, great color for her! Octavia, thought this was so flattering and a beautiful choice for her Jennifer embodies the new Hollywood princess, who even takes a tumble every now and then! Charlize…the picture of elegance, sophistication and cool beauty I thought she looked fabulous and carried off this color and style beautifully! Initially I went back and forth but since this is the color I want my master bedroom swathed in, I decided to fall in love. She does look quite elegant, maybe would have opted for a different hairstyle but the dress is a work of art. Kerry looked beautiful in this stunner of a gown, loved the beaded bodice and bow…..great color Georgina Chapman (wife of Harvey Weinstein) and of Marchesa fame….always so elegant I didn’t care for the bottom but overall thought she looked so pretty While it did not initially “wow” me, I have to say I do think she looks great, its age appropriate flattering, elegant and hey its Americas sweetheart…I love Sandra! (Shes the Kelly Clarkson of movies, knows how to keep it real) Zoey looked so pretty in this blue floaty gown….it compliments her beautiful eyes so well Adele is so pretty and I love that she dresses for her body in things shes comfortable inThe misses or near misses (but I at least tell you why and my own thinking behind what went wrong) Helen, what would possess you to have H&M make you a dress that looks like a wrinkled mess before the show even starts? Girlfriend…… there’s a time and place to go for the almighty bargain and to try to make an ” eco statement” but I think we can all agree……the red carpet is most definitely not the time OR the place! Near miss- Jen, yes we know you are very pretty. and that it doesn’t take much effort for you to look good and you seem to rely on that which is awesome. But seriously…….could you just this once have done something with “the hair” (yes the hair is spoken to in third person) its that famous. Maybe a half up do with a gorgeous pair of earrings perhaps? A touch of red lipstick? Still love you though! This picture sort of leaves me speechless…so lets stop there. Hey, at least she was having fun hamming it up! She has a very pretty face, is hysterical and you can see is genuinely comfortable in her own skin, bravo to her BUT what was she thinking? This dull gray jersey dress did nothing for her, the mullet of the hairstyle can only be worn by people like Babe Paley and other serious style icons….I just didn’t get this at all and can think of 10 other looks and colors that would be been way more flattering. Anne, I love you and always think you are so elegant and classy, but I expected more…sorry! (did love your hair though) The “darts” were also not very becoming and a bit of an unfortunate optical illusion! What can I say to me you are a fashion icon so this just fell a little short. Kristin…ugh, were you taking a nap and woke up and decided to maybe just maybe to hit the red carpet? That’s what it looked like…..I mean you could have at least brushed your hair!! Pretty girl but it was all too “pale”. I also feel like this dress appears dated like it belonged to a country and western star accepting an award years ago, not feeling it…if she was going to do this she should have brightened up her face with more color…something! Salma, you are a pint sized bombshell…we all know that but this particular dress in my humble opinion belongs on a tall starlet..its just too much for your tiny frame and I feel like it swallows you up. And I don’t know…… black velvet in California? Just not feeling it…sorry but don’t feel too sorry for her because she is afterall married to the most amazing closet husband in the world! My new BFF’STwo people that I could see being bff’s with…just love their candid authentic personalities, you can tell they are the “real deal”… we would get along famously, I can just tell! If either of you are reading this, I am free for lunch next Thurs. or Friday but after 1:) Call me! Best commercial….Best commercial of the night…JCP gotta hand it to you. You are proving that you are really do have more than 9 lives and sure came out swinging a home run with this beautiful commercial ( I was sure it was for Hallmark or the Wounded Warriors or something like that, really was surprised when I saw it was JCP) but it was so well done… Adele’s voice…..Loved Adele’s song and her reaction was so real….that voice, is just something! Best Speech Best speech of the night..its actually a 2 way tie, between Daniel Day Lewis and Ben Affleck, so if you missed them there they are! I felt they were both incredibly humbled and you could see and feel the emotion..it just made you so happy for them. Not to mention they both represented two fabulous films, well done boys! Biggest mysteries of the night, things that make you go hummmm…….. What was up with Renee’s eyes? Why couldn’t she read much less open her eyes? Every time she was handed a cue card, she passed it to someone else and she seemed to be having a hard time standing up? It was really bizarre and did not go unnoticed……. Just what does Jane do to look so amazingly young and fit? Inquiring minds need to know! Why oh why was Brandi there? Shes a reality show housewife with a filthy mouth and then to boot she wore this horrid ensemble. Yikes! Hey Brandi….newsflash, have you ever heard of “leave something to the imganation”? Barbara I love you…..and your voice is still sooo amazing but why didn’t anyone tell you long sharp nails frosted nonetheless went out a long time ago with shoulder pads,velvet chokers and waist high jeans Cutest and happiest looking couple(s)…. Love how real they both seem……..love them Channing and Jenna..so sweet! Didn’t love her dress but she still looks beautiful and they do seem so happy…good for them! Gotta say she looks so happy…….at last:) She is positively glowing! Love how they seem like they are best friends…….his warmth and authenticity cancels out the fact that I was “not feeling” her decision to wear pants on the red carpet And I must include this “one of a kind couple” because judge them as you will…they are totally meant for one another and do seem quite happy:) Loves come in all shapes, sizes and colors and clothing choices! Are you wondering who their hairdressers are? Me too:) And finally while a few of his jokes might have crossed the line (and there were indeed some that probably should not have been included), or fell flat, I think Seth overall did a great job. I actually really enjoyed his wit, humor and quite good voice ( a surprise). He is really a talented guy and I thought a good choice….and Seth in reply to what you opened with, that you were on a quest to get Tommy Lee Jones to laugh..you succeeded! That was pretty funny and something I had noticed myself from previous shows. Hope you enjoyed my little Oscar rundown. Again its all meant to be in good fun, please take no offense to any playful criticism and know we can agree to disagree...we all know these people are amazing and have given us countless hours of awesome entertainment on the big screen so thank you for that! Hats off to you and congrats to all the winners……it was a beautiful night! PS Helena Bottom Carter looks like a major fashion queen next to what I was wearing last night….think yoga pants, robe, fuzzy socks, you get the picture:) Your turn…who knocked it out of the park in your book and who never made it past homeplate? Do tell!