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Hi friends, hope you are doing well. The winner of four ornament giveaway is
#52
Maria on
I absolutely love the topiary ornament and it would go so well with all my topiaries around the house. I love topiaries and boxwoods!
Please contact us at [email protected] to provide your name and shipping address so these can be on the way.
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Over here, its been a very surreal 6 weeks. I never could have imagined feeling so sad but have crossed over into new territory since my mom passed away. To lose the person who loved me the most in this entire world is really a loss that is hard to put into words, unless you too, have experienced it. And if you have, I am sorry that we are both part of the same unfortunate club.
I have my days (many) where just getting dressed feels like a major accomplishment. Doing small organizational things here in our new house can feel like a herculean effort as well (but feels good to get it done). Even thinking about the holidays makes me want to faint. While I enjoy going onto Instagram and seeing all the beauty that abounds in everyone’s Christmas decorations, at the same time, it utterly overwhelms me at the same time.
Hard to believe just a year ago I was one of them. Christmas music makes me incredibly sad and just the holidays all around are very hard to think about. And yet, it’s hard to ignore them, holiday reminders are everywhere (as they should be) just for me, personally, it’s a huge trigger for how much I miss my mom. I have spent a lot of time going through pictures and various mementos, some that I forgot about as we unpack and settle into our new home.
A friend sent me this incredible cozy blanket, so so soft that I have been enjoying in the small cozy library of the new house. I will get you the brand as it’s a blanket everyone should have!
The shelves are full of pictures of my mom
And a few well meaning friends have sent me some books, which I have just started reading, these two I am really enjoying a lot (if enjoy is even the right word) But let’s say I am definitely getting a lot out of them, and they are a strong validation to how I am feeling
This one is a journal the you fill in and I love it as it’s going to be a beautiful keepsake in honor of my mom and a special way to keep so many memories alive in my heart
I am so torn because on one hand I am trying to be as strong as I can for my family, but the truth is I feel like doing absolutely nothing. I do mean nothing. If I could sleep in my bed 24/7, I think I would. I really wish I could sleep through after Christmas as the holidays already feel totally unbearable.
I do not minimize the fact that we were moving into a new house at the same time adding extra stress but if there is one sliver of happiness it is that both my husband and I are very happy in our new home. Amazingly we felt within a few days that this was “home”. I did not expect that one bit, perhaps it was my mom at work wanting me to feel some peace and comfort. I would like to think so.
I have been into my office twice in 6 weeks and even that, felt overwhelming. Thankful beyond measure for a wonderful and dedicated team to keep things going. But I did decide that every day, I am going to do one small thing. It could be something as small as putting some makeup on or going into my office for a few hours, etc….that’s about the extent of what I feel capable of. Going into my office, allowed me to see all the new things that came in while I was gone. These are just a fraction but took a few pictures-
And took home a few “pick me ups”
I have many well meaning friends who have offered many times to take me out, come over, etc…but truth is right now socializing just feels like it takes too much energy. I have said no to every invitation I have received for the month of December. I am sad about it (as I generally enjoy socializing) but there’s just no way I can go out and put on a happy face at a baby shower, Christmas party or birthday celebration. Not fair to me or the guests. So December is kind of a write off. Hoping with the start of the new year, I will feel a bit better. I did start working with a grief counselor this week, and am hoping that too will help me get through this tough time.
Continue to get so many cards in the mail, always bring tears to my eyes as they mean so much.
Received these pretty roses and love them in one of my pretty blue and whites
One of the other things I am going to do is to start my Seven on Sunday post next weekend, it may lack some of the usual vigor and enthusiasm for all things beautiful (or may not) but I will do my best. It is cathartic for me and I think getting back to that routine will be good for me. I am grateful to many people- my wonderful and caring family, close friends who are there for me unconditionally, so many amazing readers, customers and Instagram followers. I came home to so many wonderful and sweet cards, small gifts, such thoughtfulness. I know that made my mom happy too to see people wanting to take care of me and caring enough to do so.
The one thing I had myself do yesterday was to take out a few of the many holiday decorations and add a little holiday cheer, lit a holiday candle and did my best to savor even a tiny bit of this magical season. It did not make me want to miraculously change out of my robe or go anywhere, but within the confines of my home, it definitely felt warmer and more holiday like. A tree has yet to go up and until a few days ago I said I wouldn’t bother but my husband thinks it’s a good idea, so perhaps we will put one up after all.
And that my friends, is the latest over here. I look forward to “introducing” you to our new home very soon. I also hope next Sunday to get back to my Seven on Sunday posts. And in due time, things I am sure will fall into place. It’s a new world without my mother in it, and one I need to learn how to navigate but understand it will take some time. Thanks for hanging in there with me:) I am sad to think many of you, as I have learned through your emails and cards, have gone through this too and your pearls of wisdom mean a lot and give me hope for happier days ahead.
I hope everyone is enjoying the holiday season which has come upon us so fast. We will hold our Holiday Love contest and will announce it next week so hope you are taking pictures as you go through the beautiful holiday season. Hope everyone has a wonderful day, until next time…
Last day to save 30% off on all holiday gift wrap and newly stocked ribbon! Use code- merry
Click here here to see the collection
Tomorrow will begin our beautiful annual Vagabond House event
Love you mom
Tina, I lost my mother at 65, I was just 45. I honestly never thought I would loose her so soon. With just 20 years separating us I assumed I had lots of time. I am now 67 and I can’t say I miss her less; but the overwhelming grief has lessened. Life moves on whether we are involved or not. Eventually the love of your family will becomes a comfort. I have grown children and grandchildren and I am try to make memories for them that my mom made for me. I hope that helps. ( as I am crying though this)
Keeping you, your Family and your Mom in my prayers. Losing a Mom is the worst thing. I promise you that things will get better–not today, or tomorrow or next week, but it will. Just cherish all the memories you have made. Your Mother is at peace. Even though she is not here physically, she will always be in your heart.
Tina, I am so very sorry. You have been in my prayers ever since your dog passed. Now I will uplift you and pray God will grant you the strength and peace you need. What a beautiful mother God gave you. The gifts you have for decorating must have come from her.
Please know I am truly praying for you🙏
Tina, I was glad to read that you have reached out to a grief counselor to help you at this difficult time. As he/she will tell you, there is no timeline for the grief process…everyone is different. I hope you do recognize that you are processing your loss, even doing the smallest things helps…setting a little daily goal is great. But hey, if you don’t feel like celebrating at this time, then don’t! It’s ok….
Keeping you in my thoughts…
Tina, Please let the comfort and caring of friends and family ease some of the pain you feel right now. Take your time returning to full productivity, all of your followers will be here and continue to offer support and send blessings your way. As a member of the lost my mom group, I can feel the pain and sorrow. The surprise of grief when you don’t expect it, the weight we carry, the search for peace and sudden tears is part of the journey that so many want to help us on. Prayers sent to you and all those who loved your mother. Sherry B
Oh Tina, my heart absolutely breaks for you. You and your mother had such a special relationship. She must have been the most wonderful mother to have raised such a kind and caring daughter as you. You brighten all of our lives and it’s all due to the mother who raised you so sweetly. I lost my most precious mother 2 1/2 years ago. She was good and kind and everyone loved her. She was supportive of everything we did and made us feel like nothing was impossible. And she was so proud of us. I believe she was a lot like your sweet mom. The ‘first’ of everything, Christmas, Mother’s Day, Her birthday, will be very hard for you. I still cry a little most days. When we have the best mothers, we are so very lucky. But it makes it that much harder to lose them. Your mom is right there beside you every day. Talk to her, there is nothing wrong with that. Kiss her precious photo goodnight, there is nothing wrong with that. Having pictures of our precious mothers everywhere is such a help. You and your mother will forever be in my thoughts and prayers. I pray for you to have peace and for you to find happiness again in the little things. And always remember she is right there, you just can’t see or hear her. But you can feel her. You will be with her again, We will all be with our mothers again. That keeps me going. Much love and sympathy to you dear girl.
Hi Tina, i’m so sorry that you are feeling so sad but it is completely understandable and it signifies how strong you felt about your mother and how deep your love was. That is Worth celebrating in itself because not all are so lucky.
though it is cliché sounding at this point I promise you that with time you will smile at the memories more than you’ll cry.
How Lucky you both were to have each other. Keep her memories alive by talking about her, reminiscing about fond memories etc. that is important.
I am happy that you are pacing yourself and it is so understandable that you do not feel like doing anything, you may feel that way for a few months and there’s nothing wrong with that at all. I literally took a leave of absence for 8 weeks. thankfully, I had a very understanding and empathetic employer.
The glimpses of your holiday decor are so elegant and beautiful. I can’t wait to see more of your home and I have no doubt your mom is watching down on you guiding you through this. You got this Tina!!
I lost both parents within 2 months of each other. They were extremely close and devoted. At the same time, I was caring for my beloved husband, who was dying with Parkinson’s. I wanted him home and so thankful that Hospice made the difference . Can’t say enough positive things about this organization. After his death, I felt apart -cried constantly, stayed in bed, not interested in seeing anyone. I decided that I could no longer exist like that so I went to a psychiatrist for counseling. She helped and began to take Prozac. Had I gone to her while my husband was still alive, I think that I would not have hit rock bottom. You are still in the deep throes of grieving and the shock of loosing your mom. You will find your way back because you are your mother’s daughter and that’s what we do. Prayers as you go through this sad time
Tina, you have brought grace and beauty to so many people through your elegant life and work. At this time, in this unique year, please give yourself the grace to walk through grief step by step. You’ve experienced two of life’s biggest stressors simultaneously-the loss of a beloved parent and moving to a new home! It’s ok to just do one thing each day. Ok, if your husband is encouraging you to have a tree, put up one tree, but not ten. When I realized my husband will need yet another surgery, I decorated the house simply and decided not to put up a tree. The Nativity set is out, the stockings are hung for the kids and grandkids, I just don’t have the energy for elaborate decor this year. It’s a very freeing decision, frankly. God bless you, Tina.
It will get better! But I do find the holidays bring back the sadness! Keeping busy is so important!
You will always miss your Mother. But keep the happy memories in your mind
I hope this isn’t the wrong thing to say but I am thankful that you had such a lovely mother in addition to feeling so very sorry for your loss. Not everyone has a positive role model or source of unconditional love In a mother. For some, the relationship is painful. Yours seems like she was a blessed treasure and I can imagine this must feel like an incredible loss. Praying you feel comfort some where in each day. Please know her beauty lives on in you. Sending love your way…
Dear Tina,
My heart goes out to you! My mother has been gone almost 30 years and I still love her. The only person that can truly comfort you is God himself. Run to him and ask him for his comfort. In my Advent Devotional for today is a verse from Isaiah 49: 15 & 16.
…I will not forget you! See, I have engraved you on the palms of my hands. Praying you will find comfort and peace.
The Devotional book is:The Greatest
Gift by Ann Voskamp.
So glad you have a wonderful husband to help you through this very hard time in both of your lives. Put up the tree even if you don’t feel like it, if just for him. My husband has been a constant by my side for over 35 years, and I think I appreciate him more now than ever! So sorry for your loss, but especially at this time of year makes it so very hard.
Tina – My heart goes out to you! When you lose someone you love that much, it is absolutely gut wrenching. I was in my 40’s, when I lost both my parents – my father passed away on Christmas Eve (one week to the day after his 75th birthday) and my mother 5 years later on January 4th. Our birthdays were all in December…15th, 17th & 18th so needless to say December was a big deal in our home. Christmas has always been, and still is my favorite time of year.
It has now been over 20 years and every day the memories of my parents bring me comfort, love, and unbridled joy! When the people we love are forever in our hearts, they are forever in our lives.
My wish for you is that one day you will feel the same.
Tina, my heart goes out to you. I too lost my beloved Mother 3 years ago. Everyday I see something beautiful, or do something fun, I still want to call her and tell her about it. It’s so hard. Healing the body and soul takes lots of time, and everyone is different. Let December go! No worries, another December will be here next year. Take the time to heal in your own way, let your heart be your guide. That’s the right thing to do for yourself and your family. Just keep looking forward and take tiny steps (and sometimes, no steps, or steps backward), let others embrace and help you now, The time and the healing is going to happen, and you are going to be ok. God bless, sending hugs. XOXO
That 1st Christmas is unforgettable. As a 21 year old who father passed after just a few months of illness, I was faced with helping my mother who was incapacitated with a debilitating form of multiple sclerosis which affecting her speech and mobility AND returning to college for my senior year, only got through this because I had my mom depending on me. So many changes but the hardest in the following couple of years was helping my mom sell the home my parents had built, and helping her resettle 3 hours away near her sister and my sister. Let your family help and help them get through this, too. FAMILY is everything. Bless you.
Dear Tina,
Through these posts I know I feel like a friend and so feel your sorrow. I’ve list both my parents and within a month my husband suddenly died in his sleep without warning. I can only tell you no two people grieve the same just as no two people love the same way. It’s personal and you will find your way through. Seeking counseling is a great thing to help, but in the end you will find your way. Holidays are always the worst. Each year it still pains but with just a bit less than the last. Pain becomes wonderful (and yes even fun) memories.
Do what you can each day and be good to yourself enjoy the love from your husband and boys.
Sending prayers, white healing light and big hugs.
I lost my mom when I was 32. I still think of her every day. She died in November, one month before Christmas and because she loved Christmas so much, we did put up our tree that December. It does get easier, but you will always hold her in your heart. My condolences.
Tina, I think it’s understandable that you are taking the time you need to deal with your grief. It’s very important for you to do what you need. My mother died 3 years ago and I didn’t take the proper time and was very hard on me. Get plenty of rest, you are in my thoughts and prayers.
Dear Tina,
My heart breaks reading of your grief. I still have my mother. She is 91 but I cannot fathom life without her. I want you to know how much of an inspiration you have been for me in my life. Now in my early 70’’s, I’ve stopped purchasing things for my home but I never miss Seven on Sunday because I love trying out your decorating ideas and recipes. You, my sweet sister, have helped thousands of women with your ideas and inspiration. Probably many of those women have been where you are now, lost in a world of grief. I know that I have been in that same world where sadness reigns after the loss of a niece through Covid. Your Sunday posts helped me move on. I always looked forward to seeing the beautiful treasures, incorporating your ideas with my own. I still enjoy all that you share with us. Please know that grief takes lots of time, energy and determination to move forward. You will do it your way. Your mom will be by your side in the invisible, encouraging you in ways only you will recognize. You are a smart woman to seek grief counseling. I pray that it offers you comfort in your loss. God bless you.
Tina, I can’t read your post without crying😭 I am so sorry that you are going through such a sad loss, during your move, and the holidays😭 I am happy that you have such good friends, and are getting counseling. It seems like everywhere I turn, there is so much sadness. My nephews son was run over by a car, and died back in July in the Hamptons, and he is having a very difficult time, but has such great friends that have helped in so many ways, but it doesn’t make the pain any less. I have been taking care of my sister, who has had a terminal illness, for almost four years now, and she is barely hanging on. I put a wreath on my door, but that’s all, and too sad to do anymore, and that’s okay.😭 Please don’t feel like you have to please others, or live up to their expectations Just take it slow, and take care of you ❣
I’m so very sorry and understand completely how you feel. Holidays always have a touch of melancholy for me since my parents are gone. I do fill with joy when I remember funny, silly and cherished things we shared too many times to count over the holidays. God bless you and your family♥️
Sounds like you are doing all the right things. Take your time Tina. Little by little you will feel better. Thinking of you
Tina: I lost my husband suddenly 3 1/2 years ago and getting out of bed each day for the first few weeks was my accomplishment. I didn’t have words for prayers, so I often just sat. And I remember feeling so tired and so sad that I didn’t think I would ever feel like myself again. One of the things my grief counselor helped me with was that I would learn to integrate my grief into all my other everyday activities. I did not want to make polite talk with friends for a long time. Being kind to myself and just “being” with my feelings, whatever they were at the moment allowed me to feel that I had taken care of myself in the midst of overwhelming grief. It does not make it less, but one of the most beautiful sentiments I heard and still remember is “grief is the price of love” — and you loved your Mom beyond words — and what a gift to her and to you that you felt love so deeply.
Sometimes grief simply comes at the wrong time. Advent is one of those times. People may be urging you to “jolly up” and “she’s in a better place.” Ugh. You don’t really need silly platitudes. You must allow yourself to grieve your way, to feel whatever you feel, even wallow in the sadness if you need to, have yourself a good cry. More than once. Then put the kettle on. Make yourself a cup — oh, no! a MUG — of tea. Wrap your hands around that mug and savor a quiet moment to yourself. After all, tomorrow is another day. Scarlett O’Hara said so. ~ Jo Shafer
Congratulations on your new home…I’m sure it is beautiful. I’m so sorry you are going through the angst of the loss of your beautiful mother….these losses are a daily journey, and you will get through it and come out stronger on the other side…your mom would want that. Start by doing the little things as you are to getting back to normal…a new normal but life is still a beautiful journey for youxxx
I’m so sorry! Our moms are SO special – they should live forever! Hugs
I understand completely how you feel. When my father died I was 24 years old, there was no warning he simply dropped dead of a heart attack. I went into the emergency room to hug him one last time and cried against his unmoving chest. It was devastating. I only wanted to hide under the covers in my bed after that. I could not stop crying at the funeral, I put my hair berets into his coffin as I wanted him to have something of mine to be with him. Horribly, his embalming fluid started to leak from his nose as I was standing by his coffin at the viewing. I would not leave his side. The funeral director told me that sometimes happens when they are so congested. What? I stayed by him and dabbed at his nose so that no one would see. It was the worst day of my life until there were other worst days. I simply could not function for a long time but went through the motions. I did rebound eventually and you will too. To be able to go on as before will not be the same but it does go on. At such a young age I decided that you never get over it, but you learn to live with it. There will be many losses but the first is and was the worst for me. I do know how you feel and am so sorry you are going through such a loss. It takes time.
Tina, You are in my prayers. May your days be blessed with peace and may you feel your moms love around you helping you to feel more like yourself again. A friend mentioned to me that when a parent passes we inherit their wisdom. It may be true. After some time, when my father passed, I felt stronger and more resilient. He raised us to believe that we could do anything and solve anything.
I’m glad to hear that you will back to posting your Seven on Sundays. I’ve experienced that we never stop thinking about our loved one or missing them but time does well to heal the heartbreaking sorrow. Take good care. FL
Tina
I was so very sorry to read about the loss of your mom. I understand your grief and sadness. Holidays are a particularly difficult time-as well as all of the “firsts” you will experience during the initial year.
I lost my father in law, my husband and my mother-all in a period of a year and a half. My husband passed the morning of Dec31, the day after our 22nd anniversary. The death of my brother also came on Dec.22, 5 years before that. The holidays have never been the same for me. I still struggle.
Give yourself time to grieve. Do what you can do for now. Rely on your faith, family and friends to help ease the pain. The first tree I put up after my husband died only had lights on it. The tree after my mom died had to be decorated by a friend. Look for the signs that she is still with you. There will be many, I promise.
May you continue to be surrounded with love during this season. I will include you in my prayers. God bless.
Tina,
Lifting you in prayer as you grieve through one of the most difficult life experiences we ever have….the loss of a wonderful and beloved mother.
I pray that the peace and comfort from our Lord Jesus, along with the love of family and friends and happy memories from such a precious mother, will sustain you in the coming days, weeks and months.
Susan Johnstone
Marietta. GA
Keep you and your family in my prayers. Your Mom would want you to be happy and enjoy your new home and Christmas. – My mom is 94 and in a Health Care Home. I cry every time I visit her. She is not doing well and it is very difficult to see. My beautiful mom is not the person she was and living a very limited life.
I’m so sorry. Prayers.